A Letter To My Two Month Old

My sweet little Vivi girl,

You are just shy of ten and a half weeks old now, but adjusting for your original due date you’re just about four and a half weeks old. Some of your habits and characteristics bring me so much joy, and though it’s hard to believe I’ll ever forget these little things, I’m sure that as the years go and you have siblings (hopefully someday, these memories will begin to blur. Here are some of my favorite things:

•   In the past month you've begun holding your head up when I put you on my shoulder. You resemble a bobble head more than you look like a baby with good head control, but we’ll take what we can get! You look so determined when you’re doing it.
•  I love how you act like you’re starving to death for each feeding. Well, maybe not when you’re screaming hysterically while the bottle is warming, but mostly it’s when you start shaking your head furiously back and forth when you see the food coming towards you. It doesn't matter if it’s when we’re bottle feeding, when I’m nursing, or sometimes even when we put your paci in your mouth, all I know is it’s just about the cutest thing ever. You even make this impatient little panting noise that sounds like a small puppy, except your mouth smells like sour milk instead.
•  I’m so thankful for the block of 4-6 hours of sleep that you get at one time during the night. The late night feedings are getting easier too, because once you’re done with your bottle we’re able to put you in your car seat (Yes, you sleep there! You have reflux and refuse to sleep in the bassinet anymore.)  with your pacifier in and your blankets tucked tightly around you,  the last thing I see before I turn your light off and return to bed is your big eyes just staring. I don’t have to put you back to bed fully asleep now! It has helped me enjoy the nightly feedings with you more now that I know I won’t have to be up for a couple of hours at a time.
• When you’re done with your middle of the night feeding, I often sing to you for a few minutes before putting you down. The most common song is “Amazing Grace” (all verses) and once I start singing you put your head on my shoulder pretty quickly. I watch you become a little more still and your eyes grow heavy. It’s just about the sweetest thing ever, especially for a mom who doesn't have a great singing voice. I've started wondering if you’ll grow up to love that song too.
• On our occasional nursing sessions, I love how you put one arm tucked underneath mine and softly touch my rib cage with your fingers. You often have the other hand stretched out on my chest, doing the same thing, usually with your eyes closed. It’s the most precious thing in the world, and makes all the pumping worthwhile when I get to enjoy those moments.
• This morning I thought I heard you stirring and went in to get you before you started fussing. I think you must've been awake for a while and just observing your room quietly, because your bright eyes were fully open when I came into the room. Expecting to hear a squawk, I tried to get you out quickly, but instead I was greeted with your first real smile at me that wasn't milk-induced. What a great way to start the morning! It put the biggest smile on my face.
• You love baths. I've learned that babies either love them or hate them. I know they say that it means you’re like your daddy because he grew up on the Minnesota lakes, but I've always loved shower/bath time. I think that’s where I do my best relaxing. And maybe that’s not like either of us.

The beauty of it all is that while you will inevitably have features and traits that are influenced by your dad and me, you are your own little person and will have your own way of life. You have your own personality! There is no other Vivian Scout out there, and I can’t wait to see what you become as you grow older. Thanks for letting me be your mama. I pray for wisdom, that we may help you grow into a kind, smart, happy little girl and (eventual) woman.

We love you, little Vivi girl.